Thursday, April 27, 2006

Gas Out!!! Stupid Morons.

Urban Legends Reference Pages: Politics (Gas Out)
(This message is for anyone who believes that if we boycott Exxon/Mobil, that the price of gas will come down.)
Dear Retards,
Once again, some moron has come with another brilliant idea to help solve the problem of soaring gas prices. Presumably, there is a cave somewhere in which a troll or some other mischevious creature, perhaps even the cast of "Jackass", sits around and comes up with asinine ideas that the ignorant masses will follow.
The fabulous "don't buy gas on such and such specific day" apparently has lost most of its supporters, either because people got bored with it or they actually had it pounded into their skulls that it wouldn't work. So, another ridiculous scheme needed to fill this particular void .
This time, the idea is that if we all band together (first flaw of any plan is EVERYBODY standing together) and not buy gas from the biggest oil company, Exxon/Mobil, then they will have to drop prices and the other companies will follow suit. It don't work that way. I'm not going to go into great detail here (please click the link at the top that will take you to Snopes and will explain the whole thing), but the basics are, Exxon won't lower it's price because people will still buy the gas. Not individual car owners, but all the OTHER gas companies that are experiencing higher demand at their pumps because the masses are still using the same amount of gas. They're just getting it from fewer places. And this foolish plan turns Exxon into yet another middleman and so the gas becomes MORE expensive.
Quick supply and demand lesson: price is based on supply and demand. If supply decreases, price goes up. If demand increases, price goes up. In the boycott scenario, all you've done is keep demand by consumers the same, increase the demand for the other gas stations, and Exxon's supply doesn't really change. The supply just goes to a different place.
People, the ONLY way to bring gas down is to lower the demand. YOU have to do that. Yes, the gas companies are evil, soulless, greedy entities but they take advantage of you because you allow it. Stop driving so fast, stop driving so much, stop buying Hummers & Excursions and other ridiculously oversized vehicles that you don't need. Don't drive to places you can walk. Buy a bicycle. If you've got public transportation, use it. Lose some weight.
It pisses me off when I see some gigantic vehicle that has one or maybe two people in it. Why do you do that? How about you only use the behemoth when you actually need it and stop sucking down gas. Yeah, mini-vans aren't cool, but neither is paying $5 a gallon for gas. If you have bought a vehicle in the last 4 years that gets less than 25 miles to a gallon, somebody needs to beat you with the learnin' stick.
I've been a big supporter of capitalism most of my life, but it requires everybody (flaw in the plan alert) to particpate if it's gonna work. Why does Starbucks charge so much money for their coffee? Because people keep buying it. Gas works the same way. Exxon made obscene profits last year. Where did that money come from? That's right, it came from YOU.
Remember if gas goes up, the cost of EVERYTHING goes up. All those freakin' trucks that haul goods across country? Gas driven. And the first thing to understand about companies is that they won't absorb the increased fuel costs, they will just pass them on to their customers, which means that you get to pay more for everything.
No poorly conceived boycott is going to get the job done. If you want to actually make a change, you have to change your lifestyle. Guess what, that Avalanche doesn't give you status except to other jackass gas guzzling jerks. Do you wanna be popular with the jerks?
Figure it out quick, people. Otherwise, you might be choosing between your house and your Excursion.

PS. Everybody should visit Snopes.com once in awhile. I finally got my mom to check this place out whenever she gets some stupid fwd message that tries to spread stupid or wrong information. Anything that comes through you inbox that purports to be fact should go through the Snopes test.

PPS. Find the MFers that tortured Mercy.

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