From the Suff Archives...

Years ago, I used to send out these email things simply called "Stuff". They consisted mostly of weird little snippets from emails, odd short stories, and other ramblings. Since I've been buried with work lately, I'll just post an old "Stuff" rant about UPS. This ran originally about 1997.

I'm fascinated by the concept of stupidity. Today, two separate but related instances of stupidity are irritating me. My cousins in Virginia have sent me a grad gift. UPS (where the U stands for "uncooperative")has been given the task of delivering it. Now, I am rarely at home, so delivering it is a problem. But of course, they aren't the least bit willing to try and set up a time when I actually am at home to bring me my package. Apparently, the customer is always right excepts when it means that the business has to actually do something that requires effort. So, I have to sit around waiting or else I won't get my package.

When I ordered my computer, UPS came by and left an evil yellow note. I called UPS and said, "Take my stuff off of the truck because I'll pick it up at your stupid warehouse!" They said okay and so when I went to pick it up, they told me that it was still on the truck. I finally managed to get my computer, albeit five days after it arrived in Ft. Worth. It's kind of like furniture stores. Sure, they're happy to take your money and then deliver it, but you have to sit around and wait between the hours of 10 AM and 6 PM even though you should be working because they don't have a clue when Biff and Bruno can drive the truck to your house and throw your expensive furniture around your yard.

The second of the separate but related instances o' stupidity is that the fools who built our house, put the doorbell thing in the entryhall, five whole feet away from the door. So, you can only hear the doorbell if you are in the living room, in the kitchen and the rest of the house is silent, in the bedrooms at the back of the house if you have Super hearing, or standing right next to the door. Since all of the stuff that I use is in the back of the house, I am always in the back of the house. Therefore, since I do not have super hearing, I don't hear the doorbell. So I guess I'm forced to sit in the living room and do nothing productive all day while I wait for UPS to come. Ah, the modern era is so efficient and advanced!